Scruffy...

You gotta admit...

You gotta admit that, the days you barely roll out of bed after hammering the snooze button 34 times, staggering to your feet on 3.5 hours of uneven sleep, with your unshaven face, your dirty clothes, your un-ironed shirts, your hair that you cut yourself in the morning because your bangs were too long, your eyebrows busting out of your skull like September weeds, your breath smelling like a deadly blend of last night's turkey burger and pickles and this morning's last squirt of three-month-old citrus-flavored toothpaste…

Those are the days you run into the hottest girls.

Struggling into work or stumbling into school, you come face-to-face with the prettiest chicks...you run into your dream woman walking down the halls…you run into the cute intern who’s here for a day visit and an overdue house-hunting trip…you run into the forty-something, flirtatious secretary in the skimpy dress that encouraged you with unsavory eye-contact in days-passed but today bristles by at the sight of your ketchup-stained trousers...

You run into your marketing director that you haven’t seen in two months… you run into that well-kept Biology professor that you've had the hots for since Freshman year but that has failed to notice you in the second row all semester but now engages you in maddening conversation about double-stranded DNA while grimacing in disgust at your unorderly appearance...

You run into your boss’s kids who are visiting for the first time and wanna meet people she works with and instead realize that you’re a grizzly bearded, Osama-Bin-Laden-lookin brown boy…you run head-first into an elevator packed with a devastating combination of hot blondes, upper-management, and campus security...

You run into everybody.

And tomorrow, when you put on that brand new Italian suit or mintly-pressed blouse from the Spring Collection... you aint running into anybody but Chucky the slightly scatterbrained and considerably heavy-set custodian... and even he aint gonna have time for you...

Cuz that's just the way it works...